Muggy

Ok, so it's majorly late right now and if I was smart I would have been in bed about two hours ago because i know how pissed im going to be tomorrow morning when I can barely wake up, pick my clothes up off the floor and go to work. Yes, that's how I get ready for work because im classy like that. I shake off the dress shirt I have worn like 4 times and throw it on and usually pick the maroon tie that has been tied for like three months laying in my pile of clothes and call myself pretty and out the door I go. Well, im gunna be a pissed bitch tomorrow.

We are very much in the second half of the year and it's unreal to me. Like that thing older people say about the years going faster is really fucking true. I really started noticing it about three years ago. Each year is flying by faster and faster, and it stresses me out a little bit. It was ridiculously muggy out this evening and i made the mistake of wearing jeans thinking it was going to be easy breezy beautiful cover girl out. Instead it was warm sticky jeans clinging to my thighs out muggy. I went on a really long date that in theory went alright but I came up my steps in the building and I wanted to cry. I could ellaborate on why but honestly I just unloaded a bunch of it on two of my roomies, who are uber awesome and really wise so yay them because I love them. I'm just so exhausted by the amount of energy I have put into going on dates lately, putting myself out there and not feeling anything but beige. I feel like I have hit new levels of mediocrity and its extremely frustrating. I never want to be that writer of blogs who bitches about feelings and men all the time but Isuppose its necessary once in a while right? To keep it human. My roomates gave me very sound advice and I'm feeling a bit better now, less anxious and a little more centered.

Ohh NYC summer how much do you suck? Let me count the ways. I am very ready for fall, its one of the reasons I love living in New York and I really want to go to Central Park more in the next few months, something I rarely do. My roomate Dan made a really good point tonight which I will summarize.Basically, nothing good is ever going to happen if you keep doing the same things over and over that have never worked and expect them to eventually work. Soemtimes you totally need to switch it up, to change course and do something totally different, change your way of thinking(love you Mr. Dylan.) And I am really going to try that. Here is to Fall and better and different things coming my way.

Tilda, Queen of Scots

God I wish there was a Church of Tilda sometimes.....

Look at that pastey, ethereal lovely. Too much. Tilda Swinton has dabbled in a lot of different film genres and I've always been a little awed by her talent and just how other worldly and yet earthy she comes across. She isn't a Streep and I adore that about her. Although I am obsessed with Streep, there is something a little more subdued about TS that im drawn to. I love her. A lot. I have a thing for red haired women and throw in a dose of weird and talent and I'm on board totally.

All I want to do is traipse across foggy, rainy moors in the highlands with her and pick heather in the fields. Isn't that the Scottish national pastime?

America apparently runs on it.

Beginnings! Not really since i did enter two blog entries prior to this one about a year ago, one i think related to dieting and myself or something and I don't have a clue where they went. Well here I am again regardless, and upfront I am beyond dumb and also very behind on anything technological or media related. It's sad, and definitely not even a cutesy, endearing quality.

No worry though I have plenty of those in spades. Or something.

So I love the written word. Whether it's Vanity Fair articles on old Hollywood"(I really hate that phrase), or Gone With the Wind(my personal favorite), Joye Carol Oates, Fem Lit(get into it.), i crave reading, absorbing info, opening my mind to everything.

Writing and I have a different relationship. We tend to be like a close acquaintance you've known since childhood. There is a long connection and you have a good enough rapport but it's not really a uber-comfortable bond. Strained metaphors but what do you expect at this hour. Exactly.

So over the past few years the idea of actually writing  has been in my thoughts, increasing as other parts of my life fell into place such as job, school and blah. I think it's important for me to at least tap into the writing part and hopefully it enhances the bookworm side of me. I am really hesitant to put myself out there because in my mind my writing is sub-par and also I think im funny in life but that doesnt translate to funny on paper.

So here I am. The beginning of something amazing. Or the beginning of a 24 year old who's is writing a blog and maybe it will be great and maybe he will write 4 posts and forget about it for two years. The latter is definitely closer to home.

Dunkin' Donuts I pretty much live for. I had a blueberry iced coffee after a swim tonight. They had bright pink straws which made me really happy.

Also i think their slogan sucks.